Ludwig van Beethoven Joke

What's brown and sits on a piano bench?

Beethoven's First Movement.

Computer Joke

43rd Law of Computing:
Anything that can go wr
fortune: Segmentation violation -- Core dumped

Woman Joke

Why do men break wind more than women?

Because women can't shut up long enough to build up the required pressure.

Supermarket Joke

A young man was hired by a supermarket and reported for his first day of work. The manager greeted him with a warm handshake and a smile, then gave him a broom and said,

"Son, your first job will be to sweep out the store."

"But I'm a college graduate," the young man replied indignantly.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't realise that," said the manager. "Here, give me the broom -- I'll show you how."

Fish Joke

What did the fish say when it swam into a wall?

Damn!

Lightning Joke

How is lightning like a violist's fingers?

Neither one strikes in the same place twice.

Sex Joke

Why does Hillary want to have sex with Bill Clinton first thing in the morning?

She wants to be the first lady.

Yo momma Joke

Yo momma is so fat. She puts on lipstick with a paint roller.

Army Joke

What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A flat major.

Cat Joke

What do you call a positively charged pussy-cat?

A CATion.

Man Joke

Why is a man like the weather?

Nothing can be done to change either one of them.

Man Joke

What do most men think Mutual Orgasm is?

An insurance company.

Ego Joke

Four words to ruin a man's ego ...

"Is it in YET?"

Yo momma Joke

Yo momma is so fat, she stepped on a scale and she saw her phone number.

Light bulb Joke

How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

One-two, one-two, one-two.