Woman Joke

What is the thinnest book in the world?

"What men know about women."

Biology Joke

You enter the laboratory and see an experiment. How will you know which class is it?

If it's green and wiggles, it's biology.
If it stinks, it's chemistry.
If it doesn't work, it's physics.

Lawyer Joke

What's the difference between a catfish and a lawyer?

One's a bottom-dwelling scum sucker and the other's just a fish.

Blonde Joke

What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells?

Pregnant.

Blonde Joke

What is the difference between blondes and traffic signs?

Some traffic signs say stop.

Princess Diana Joke

What's the difference between Princess Diana and Casper the ghost?

Casper can go through walls.

Earth Joke

The teacher asked Little Johnny: "How can you prove the earth is round?"

Little Johnny replied: "I can't. Besides, I never said it was."

Blonde Joke

What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells?

Pregnant.

Baby Joke

What is the best time to wean the baby from nursing?

When you see teeth marks.

Man Joke

How many men would it take to mop a floor?

No one knows. They've never done it.

Soldier Joke

Officer: "Soldier, do you have change for a dollar?"

Soldier: "Sure, buddy."

Officer: "That's no way to address an officer! Now let's try it again!"

Officer: "Soldier. Do you have change for a dollar?"

Soldier: "No, SIR!"

Doctor Joke

The man told his doctor that he wasn't able to do all the things around the house that he used to do. When the examination was complete, he said: "Now, Doc, I can take it. Tell me in plain English what is wrong with me."

"Well, in plain English," the doctor replied, "you're just lazy."

"Okay," said the man. "Now give me the medical term so I can tell my wife."

Woman Joke

Why do men chase women they have no intention of marrying?

For the same reason dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.

Lawyer Joke

What do you have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?

Not enough sand.

Man Joke

What are two reasons why men don't mind their own business?

1) No mind.
2) No business.