7 Funny short jokes to wake you up

We just watched the Tetris movie.
It's a blockbuster My family is getting sick of me telling dad jokes 24/7.
Or should I say “they are sick of me telling dad jokes 3.428571428571429”? When I was younger I had a job pretending to be a statue.
I held that position for some time. The new thought-activated car they're working on is going to be even more popular than the voice-activated one.
It goes without saying. My wife is one of the clumsiest people I know.
I'm so glad she fell for me I have two questions about this Taylor Swift lady:
What kind of clothes does she make? And how fast does she make them, really? I can't think of a time when I lost my toupee while riding a motorcycle.
At least not right off the top of my head. What do you call a 400 pound alcoholic?
A heavy drinker.