What do clouds wear underneath their pants?
Thunderwear. What's the leading cause of dry skin?
Towels. He says “Doc I have been having really strange dreams for the last monthâ€. Doc asks “Ok. What are the dreams?â€. Bloke says “It's like there is a football World Cup going on. Every night I see a football match but with donkeys! It's driving me crazy! That's all I think about all dayâ€.
Doc smiles, thinks for a while, and says “Ok. Here is a prescription. Take 2 pills tonight before sleeping and you won't have any of those dreams any longer.â€
Bloke thanks the doctor profusely, gets up and walks to the door. He pauses, turns around and asks the doc “Doc if it is ok, can I start the medicine from tomorrow night?â€. Doc looks puzzled and asks him “Why? Why not tonight?â€. Bloke looks down and whispers “Tonight is the finalâ€. What's your net worth?
However many fish it catches that day! Before going away the neighbours gave me a spare key to feed their cat.
Poor thing choked to death on it. I told my neighbours they could eat whatever they wanted when they housesat for me.
Damn, I miss that goldfish. Did you hear about the bartender that pushed his wife off a cliff? He made a Bloody Mary on the rocks.
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