What do clouds wear underneath their pants?
Thunderwear. What's the leading cause of dry skin?
Towels. He says âœDoc I have been having really strange dreams for the last monthâ. Doc asks âœOk. What are the dreams?â. Bloke says âœIt's like there is a football World Cup going on. Every night I see a football match but with donkeys! It's driving me crazy! That's all I think about all dayâ.
Doc smiles, thinks for a while, and says âœOk. Here is a prescription. Take 2 pills tonight before sleeping and you won't have any of those dreams any longer.â
Bloke thanks the doctor profusely, gets up and walks to the door. He pauses, turns around and asks the doc âœDoc if it is ok, can I start the medicine from tomorrow night?â. Doc looks puzzled and asks him âœWhy? Why not tonight?â. Bloke looks down and whispers âœTonight is the finalâ. What's your net worth?
However many fish it catches that day! Before going away the neighbours gave me a spare key to feed their cat.
Poor thing choked to death on it. I told my neighbours they could eat whatever they wanted when they housesat for me.
Damn, I miss that goldfish. Did you hear about the bartender that pushed his wife off a cliff? He made a Bloody Mary on the rocks.
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